110 Percent

I’m pretty damn good at math.  I mean, I’m no Will Hunting or anything, but I do consider myself to be proficient with numbers.  Fractions (and, by association, percentages) are kinda my jam.  Looooove me some fractions.

Anyway, back to the point.  Sorry I got distracted there; this entry was only receiving about 75% of my attention.  See, now THAT is an appropriate use of percentages.  To simplify the concept of what a percentage is (for all you fractards out there)… let’s say that, hypothetically, I have a total of 100 “attention units” in my twisted, weird-ass brain.  Just before, I was only dedicating 75 out of the 100 “attention units” to writing this.  Hence, the entry only received 75% of my attention.

Contrary to what you’ve heard from coaches and commentators on ESPN, it’s impossible for an athlete to “give 110%,” ever.  That athlete would have to give more than he actually has, which is a physical impossibility.  I admire Percy Harvin as much as any sports fan, but no matter how well he played or what they say on ESPN, I guarantee you he didn’t actually give 110%, because that isn’t a real thing.  He may have given 110% of what the commentators thought he was capable of giving, but that’s just their mistake.  For all we know, that might’ve only been 85% of Percy’s total “football effort units.”  Percy is a complicated individual, so let’s not assume we know how many “football effort units” he has, okay?

The adorable baby kittens pictured above have absolutely nothing to with the concept of 110%.  They’re just there for your enjoyment.

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