If You Can’t Handle Toilet Paper, Then Wipe With Your Hand In The Shower

 

Real nice.  You couldn’t be bothered to tear off the old empty roll and install a fresh one, like a friend?  Just left the new roll in close proximity to the TP apparatus and went about your non-restroom-related business, without a care in the world.  I bet you pull these shenanigans also.

This pitiful setup does not count as replacing the roll, okay?  What… you think you’re too good to dispose of the very toilet paper roll that you finished during your latest bout of wiping, which means your hand probably went back and forth from that particular roll to your butthole a number of times?  Well, you’re not.  Soft, deluxe, luxury bath tissue is not a right; it’s a privilege.

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