My, my, my… that is a lot of urine. I’d clean it up, but it’s not mine! It is the urine of another man.
But I’m at a friend-of-a-friend’s house party, and there are a few ladies waiting for the bathroom right now. They’re out there in the hallway, chatting amongst themselves and waiting to void their respective bladders. So they’re definitely gonna notice the large central globules of pee, as well as the abundant misty urine on the periphery of the toilet seat, and they’ll probably assume it was me with the runaway urethra. I now have 3 choices:
- Clean up a hearty portion of another man’s filthy urine
- Be framed for peeing on the seat when, in fact, my stream was incredibly accurate
- Leave the urine where it is, and immediately upon exiting the bathroom, declare loudly that I was not responsible for the drenched toilet seat
Not an enviable position to be in.
Special Thanks To Corey Witt for thinking about pee often enough to come up with this idea.