People Who Voluntarily Paint Themselves Like Statues

“Hey, Carol!  You gotta come over here and see this!  This guy painted himself completely silver and is standing really still!” exclaimed Stan.

Question:  Do you think this guy waits until nobody is around to get into position?  Or is he just a guy painted silver, amid rush hour traffic, that walks over to a prominent position near a pillar and then just, ya know, stops?

There are too many people standing there and watching.  The guy is standing still.  That’s it.  He’s not moving.  He’s not gonna do anything other than not move.  You know this.  Is this really worthy of stopping to watch?  If someone’s not moving, MAYBE it’s worthy of a quick glance to confirm that he is, in fact, not moving.  But come on… really.  Just… come on.

If this guy were in a movie, I wonder if he’d want to be credited as something cool like Starlight, or by his birth name, Neil Jeffries.  Yes, we’re assuming this man’s name is Neil Jeffries.  Can you prove his name is not Neil Jeffries?


One Response to “People Who Voluntarily Paint Themselves Like Statues”

  1. Dan B says:

    Yeah but you’ve gotta admit it’s pretty awesome when the statue guys follow you around and then when you turn cause you think someone’s following you, they freeze.

    So no one’s following you, it’s just a statue. But wait a minute, was it smiling like that before? And how is it still right behind me? And then you’re like, ah ha ha it’s really a guy.

    And then the two of you laugh it up together and go grab a beer, and periodically in the bar he freezes and new people are like, why does this bar have a statue? And why is that loser acting like he’s friends with the statue? And then he unfreezes and everyone at the bar laughs together, and they buy you guys rounds because they’re so happy it’s really a person, not a statue.

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