Words I Realized: Wriznutt

wriznutt [riz-nuht], n, v – sneeze-related shirt mucus; to sneeze this mucus onto one’s shirt

Oh, come on!  Right on the freakin’ sleeve?  Really?  Dammit, self, get your shit together.  How about a little bodily control, for a change?  Anyway, back to what’s important.  Did these globs of snot originate in my throat or nose?  It’s hard to tell for sure without an MRI or something, but I’m guessing throat because that sneeze was really powerful… so powerful that it actually hurt coming out.  That kind of force can easily propel phlegm from deep within the throat onto a shirtsleeve.  Luckily, this sweatshirt is grey, so there’s a chance the sputum will just blend in, and no one will notice.  But I’ll still know it’s there and will probably be walking around with that classic guilty, I-just-wriznutted-on-this-shirt look on my face.  Alternatively, I can just wipe it off and move on with my life, but I kinda want to make a big deal out of it, emotionally.

Ralph was the only one who caught supermodel Franny Gipperman wiping the wriznutt from off her fancy dress during a photo shoot for Cosmo.

Wait, wriznutt?? I don’t get it… Can you explain?


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